Man, could I give an advice to you? Don't expect too much from other people, and try you to create "events" and invite some people, with similar interests, to join with you. Don't worry about the "no"s you will receive, pay attention to the "yes". The change start on you. This works for me.
I mean I still try and I give more than I receive for sure, but nothing seems to be working.
For the first half of my 20s I didn't leave the house under the assumption that, "if I work hard, I can live where I want to and find a job in a cool place. No reason to make friends now."
I have since replaced that assumption, but it's hard to find meaningful relationships in a place you despise.
My (not so limited) connections come from continuously contact, not common interests or hates.
Very different, oposing views and values can break a relationship. Very similar views cannot make them - only if this similarity leads to continuous contact.
My friends come from: childhood neighboors, two student organizations I was part of and college soccer team. Each of these environments allowed for years long contact with the same people. And from that came friendships. Not from similar anything.
Friendships are born from tedious hours of boring conversation with random people that only happened because no one there had nothing else better to do.
That comfortable feeling of having a meaningful relationship only comes years after that.
Agree with this, circumstance can accelerate this process: sharing some mutual experience like going on a tour or living in a foreign country can leave you making friends with people you would probably never have associated with back home
If you live in a community too small to have a meetup, make one yourself and see if anyone attends. I did it, fully expecting not a single person to show up. I met so many people through that, starting in a community of under 70,000 people.
Are there any meetups in your area or other groups that have weekly/monthly meetings? If not, can I ask where you are located? Also, have you tried volunteering? Or teaching a free class at a library or civic organization?
Life (generally) returns what a portion of what you give. If you never put yourself out there, you can't get relationships back in return. I'd focus first on getting new acquaintances, they don't have to be friends. As your circles grow, you will find some number of actual friends.
For 4 years, at university, I lived surrounded by people I didn't found interesting, and I was pretty sure that I was the problem.
Then I changed the city, and found cool people, smart and interesting, I never was so happy.
I really hope you do not stop trying, and find your place.
I think you have to at least "expect" things to change for the better socially. Maybe its just a matter of finding the right people where you can set expectations of each other? There will be times when the expectations cannot be met, but respect and communication help with that.
Sorry, I tried to mean, don't expect people will "love" you easily or for few reasons. Don't do good things to people expecting they will do the same to you, just do.
