If you ask too many of these questions you're going to set off red flags that you're an entitled person who's looking to receive more value than you contribute. I'd focus more on asking about the company's future plans and strategies.
...which is pretty sad to think. You're entitled because you want to ask a set of questions that takes maybe a few hours tops because you want to evaluate this place you are going to spend more time at than almost anywhere else for some number years into the future? It's crazy that we spend more time investigating what vacuum or small kitchen appliance to buy than we do on one of the most important decisions we ever make.
A lot of these work culture and life and tech questions can be backed into.
My series of questions when I get the chance to talk to an engineer on the team I'm interviewing for is just this, "What's a normal day at work look like for you? Not a fire drill day or anything crazy. Just walk me through what you think of as your routine."
And once you can get that conversation going, you can pretty easily suss out the answer to very many questions in the article without coming across as even really asking questions, let alone seeming like a special snowflake.
Some questions can be more direct than others. But I think many of them can be figured out through a healthy conversation in the interview process.
If you can't engage someone in that kind of a conversation someone ought to be seeing some red flags.
Also, you can ask them differently. So instead of "How late do people usually arrive/stay?" you can ask "How early do most people get to the office? Am I encouraged to come early?"
It's not the wanting to know part that makes someone seem entitled. It's the way they go about obtaining the answers to the questions they want to know. Dealing with humans sometimes requires tact, regardless of what you have to bring to the table.
