You make a good point, although I have a reservation about you somehow knowing "we could do without" some wired instincts that at first glance seem destructive. It's hard to verify whether or not society would do better if people weren't wired that way, so it seems quite spurious to assume that that would be the case. If you do it from a purely ideological standpoint I can certainly see that, but then you have to recognise it's not a given: It's simply something that you wish was true.